Wednesday, April 1, 2009

FS21

SCREEN NAME: Craven
TITLE: Buried Rage

I loved him, honored him, and band sawed him into manageable chunks.

33 comments:

Hélène Boudreau said...

LOL! This definitely hooks me. You say so much about your character in just a dozen words.

Gillian said...

Yes! Love this!

ChariDee said...

I really like the voice of this character. It's definitely one I would read on.

Scott said...

Yes.

Amethyst Greye Alexander said...

Actually, no. It might be because it feels like you're trying too hard, or maybe because I've seen a lot of this sort of first sentence twist. I'm sorry.

Amethys

redqueen1 said...

This makes me curious but I'm not sure that I'd read much more than a page or two.

Lucy Woodhull said...

Yes - the used of band-sawed is fantastic.

Janeal C. Falor said...

This really doesn't do it for me. But I think it's style thing for me more than you sentence.

Amie Stuart said...

hahahhaaaaaaaaaa I Love it.

Sheila said...

You made me laugh, thank you! And I'd definitely read on. Inspired word choice - band sawed and chunks especially.

c.e.lawson said...

Eeew. :) That said, I'd probably read on if I weren't so turned off by books about killing - but that's personal and has nothing to do with your writing. Good humor and voice.

Litgirl01 said...

Oh dear!! LOL I'd read on!! :-)

Amy said...

I felt sick after I read this... Visions of FARGO in my mind.

Eric said...

This has good voice, and I think I'd probably read further just to see whats going on.

romoak said...

I love it. I would change the 2nd and to then, thought.

honored him, then band sawed...

Jeanne Ryan said...

I'm trying to imagine how you band saw someone. Hacksaw, chain saw, but band saw makes me go huh? The body would have to be incapacitated and then lifted onto the band saw. Seems too much work when there are other means of dismemberment

I love the voice and would read on.

Judy said...

I loved this. Yes, I would read on.

Jenn Johansson said...

It is one of those shocking sentences that is interesting but also takes away a bit of my trust in the author to not jolt me quite like that. Maybe not my kind of book even thought the sentence is interesting.

Peter said...

I read this as the title being 'Craven' (which I liked) and 'buried rage' being the genre and I thought: ooh, like the genre...never heard of that one, but it's reminiscent of Saw/Hostel/etc...good genre. Than realized that was the title. Still like it. Loved the sentence. Would 'band sawed' be one word?
'manageable chunks'...love it! Very...what's the word?...meaty :)

celestialgldfsh said...

The first line is witty and shocking when presented by itself like this. Even without knowing the genre, though, this doesn't sound like my sort of book. But the line is good.

Merc said...

I'm guessing this is horror? :P

LOL, I like, I'd definitely read on. %-)

~Merc

Alice said...

ROFL! Love it. Completely hooked.

nessili said...

Good sentence--wouldn't read any farther (definitely not my kind of book or MC.

And the comments about using a band saw are correct. Unless the man she's sawing into chunks is the size of a small log, it wouldn't work so well. A table saw might be a better choice, if you have to use common woodshop tools--at least then you'd have a nice large space to balance the body on. Oh, but table saws don't tend to have very large blades--10" diameter is a typical size. Perhaps if the guy is really skinny...maybe a reciprocating saw would work best (they can have a decent length blade), if a chainsaw were not available...
After that, then you could use the band saw, like butchers do (just be careful--I had a band saw blade snap and embed itself in the wood about 1/2" from my hand. still freaks me out thinking about it)

and I can't believe I just wrote all that. How very "unessi" (word verification) of me.

Dominique said...

Oh, dear God. You certainly have my attention. I'll certainly be reading more.

Poisonguy said...

You get my vote for best one of the bunch.

Cheryl S said...

I wondered if band-saw was one word or two, but laughed at the manageable chunks.

Definitely an eye catching start

puzzlehouse said...

The title is too generic for me, and I'd hyphenate "band-sawed," but this is my choice for winner.

Fabulous!!

Anonymous said...

Brilliant!

just Joan said...

Not my type of book, but funny! I'd probably read further, but I'm not sure if I'd continue . . . but I might if it kept on like this. =)

benreeder said...

Yeah, I'd read on. Brings to mind an abused woman dealing with a very bad husband, having snapped just far enough to do what needs to be done, in spite of what it does to her sanity. Makes me want to know why she's where she is. and what "he" did to warrant his demise. Makes me want to listen to waht's going on in her head.

danceluvr said...

Gave me a chuckle. I'd read further to see what's happening.

Mary Lindsey said...

Maybe you meant a hack saw? The kind of hand saw with a tension-drawn band blade. Band saws are typically for fine detail work.

Other than that, totally hooked and amused. Fun first sentence.

Lunatic said...

Hysterical. Yeah, I'm reading on.

Fred