tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post5857008588424609372..comments2024-03-28T08:14:28.881-04:00Comments on Authoress: 10TH BIRTHDAY BLOGPITCH #13: FantasyAuthoresshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09223228949688667517noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-79409245397231266462018-03-30T20:03:45.056-04:002018-03-30T20:03:45.056-04:00The premise has me hooked! The second sentence cou...The premise has me hooked! The second sentence could use a little tidying (I would put a comma after Scorpio). Good luck!Matrilhttp://cynthiaailshie.wordpress.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-69018751660889850662018-03-30T16:36:44.307-04:002018-03-30T16:36:44.307-04:00This is fascinating...I don't think the 'n...This is fascinating...I don't think the 'new' before 'life' is needed (as the brilliant Holly mentioned). Also, this seems like it might be helped by a more personal threat to her. Good luck!Peterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03525836364241572779noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-10395796317839757372018-03-29T13:50:39.578-04:002018-03-29T13:50:39.578-04:00I think this is well done. My only concern is that...I think this is well done. My only concern is that she is motivated by concern for her patients but you say she's new to this life which makes me question how she could be so attached to them (and her life) already. I guess it also make me wonder how she became a doctor so fast! Also, this would honestly be stronger if she wanted to save a specific patient rather than a whole group. It's always harder to engage in the non-specific.<br /><br />Good luck!<br />HollyHolly Bodgerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08218140291198124199noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-21068247442237397382018-03-29T12:23:38.913-04:002018-03-29T12:23:38.913-04:00Excellent pitch! Leaves me wanting to know more! Excellent pitch! Leaves me wanting to know more! Sarah Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09940927153504938003noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-67730153487850862152018-03-29T12:21:14.482-04:002018-03-29T12:21:14.482-04:00This sounds great! This sounds great! Katiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02338521848162456432noreply@blogger.com