tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post6749041660516299982..comments2024-03-29T05:54:33.136-04:00Comments on Authoress: Talkin' Heads #20Authoresshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09223228949688667517noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-34405909230033578782013-01-29T22:01:36.523-05:002013-01-29T22:01:36.523-05:00Oh, I'm definitely interested! Jessica and Tay...Oh, I'm definitely interested! Jessica and Taylor sound like they're in for one snappy ride. :) <br /><br />It was great!Mimehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03166384979716659441noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-66269915912288050432013-01-29T15:56:39.902-05:002013-01-29T15:56:39.902-05:00As everyone else said, great work. You really capt...As everyone else said, great work. You really captured how people actually talk. The little details, like that expression "couple-three times" (I've heard that in the Midwest, so I think it's more rural than exclusively Southern), and the fact that Taylor calls Jessica by her last name, give it an extra authenticity.<br /><br />I was curious how old Jess and Taylor are. This is labeled YA, and they sound like they could be teens, so no problem there; I just didn't realize race car drivers started so young. Rebecca M.noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-84047179398331362702013-01-29T00:57:13.178-05:002013-01-29T00:57:13.178-05:00I really like the natural flow of this dialogue, t...I really like the natural flow of this dialogue, the clipped speech, like people really talk. There's a palpable tension, too, between them.<br /><br />Small thing, you don't need the ellipses if you actually interrupt the dialogue to do make a gesture. <br /><br />I'd read more and I'm not even into romance novels. :-)danikahttp://www.danikadinsmore.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-3917207292730514162013-01-28T22:47:46.327-05:002013-01-28T22:47:46.327-05:00Strong exchange, comfortable and easy to follow. I...Strong exchange, comfortable and easy to follow. I get an idea of the character's personalities and their situation.<br /><br />Keep it up.BlueWrennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-90963923363100366232013-01-28T20:22:26.723-05:002013-01-28T20:22:26.723-05:00I'm hooked. Flowed well, got a good sense of ...I'm hooked. Flowed well, got a good sense of the characters, and the specialized track lingo felt very natural, pulled me into that world. Good work!IMHOnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-19639057482026484482013-01-28T17:14:20.953-05:002013-01-28T17:14:20.953-05:00This reads really well to me. I'm assuming by ...This reads really well to me. I'm assuming by his "couple-three times" remark that he's Southern. If not, it won't sound right. Also, in the 6th paragraph, she uses "even" twice in one sentence. Other than that, it's great.Danielle La Pagliahttp://www.daniellelapaglia.comnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-57320103542755320652013-01-28T15:06:56.609-05:002013-01-28T15:06:56.609-05:00This was solid! It flows well and I enjoyed it. Ni...This was solid! It flows well and I enjoyed it. Nice work.Stephscohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06328839483008086049noreply@blogger.com