tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post1626516743506329003..comments2024-03-28T08:14:28.881-04:00Comments on Authoress: (24) Memoir: NURSE!Authoresshttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09223228949688667517noreply@blogger.comBlogger18125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-85450637663271230752014-12-08T03:02:56.830-05:002014-12-08T03:02:56.830-05:00As a nurse in my other profession, this reads like...As a nurse in my other profession, this reads like an ACLS test scenario to me. The writing is excellent and the premise won me over. But, I'd rather the book started somewhere else. I want to care about the amazing woman I've already been introduced to before the book starts. You bring up so many cool concepts in your pitch. Also, there are way better titles out there. <br /><br />When I graduated from nursing school ten years ago, I'd have loved to read something inspiring about the profession. There is value in this idea and the words. Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09500234470173797515noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-81918645514610350352014-12-02T18:04:01.664-05:002014-12-02T18:04:01.664-05:00I really liked this first page. Unfortunately, I d...I really liked this first page. Unfortunately, I don't know anything about memoirs. Don't know what makes one salable. But wanted you to know that I think you have a gripping start here. sally https://www.blogger.com/profile/11068670473065918371noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-84322275271635059892014-12-01T21:39:56.295-05:002014-12-01T21:39:56.295-05:00Good luck! :)Good luck! :)K.T. Crowleyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08211266985396588133noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-15929756821670210242014-12-01T17:04:33.428-05:002014-12-01T17:04:33.428-05:00I really liked this, and what a great subject for ...I really liked this, and what a great subject for a memoir.<br /><br />In your logline, Aust(r)alia is missing the "r."<br /><br />I just found one punctuation mistake. Your sixth paragraph, there needs to be a comma before which, unless you change which to that. <br /><br />The voice is good, the writing is strong. I'd read more. Nice work. :)<br /><br />Good luck!Karen Duvallhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01839711547501582977noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-79391886245209932162014-11-30T14:02:38.809-05:002014-11-30T14:02:38.809-05:00Count me among those who liked the title (it's...Count me among those who liked the title (it's what drew me to the entry). And I was engaged by the first page and would have read on. The promise of interesting medical stories, coupled with a personal journey that spans a time when women were just coming into their own professionally seems to offer all kinds of grist for what is sure to be a cool story. Good luck in the auction!Mercinoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-21100915359781379222014-11-30T02:11:50.762-05:002014-11-30T02:11:50.762-05:00AND THEN WHAT?? This is great! Certainly intrigui...AND THEN WHAT?? This is great! Certainly intriguing and full of possibility. The personal writing style makes it easy for someone who has zero experience in the medical field (myself included) to understand and entertaining for a large variety of readers. The fact that this is all true and pulls from actual first hand experiences makes it that much better. Great job!Laurennoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-58148588287194188692014-11-29T14:07:41.319-05:002014-11-29T14:07:41.319-05:00I too was grabbed by the opening scene and my curi...I too was grabbed by the opening scene and my curiosity would definitely keep me reading. A memoir to anticipate - good luck!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-88283292383981349632014-11-29T01:04:14.135-05:002014-11-29T01:04:14.135-05:00Really like the dramatic opening scene...I'd k...Really like the dramatic opening scene...I'd keep reading to see what happens. Elle Kaynoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-6930521934690959082014-11-28T19:20:48.791-05:002014-11-28T19:20:48.791-05:00I love the premise, and how quickly you've bui...I love the premise, and how quickly you've built suspense. The medical details are nicely balanced with your thoughts and emotions, and I can't wait to read the rest of your book.Eliza Crosshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15983577132723952685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-36928384025180334792014-11-28T19:08:26.764-05:002014-11-28T19:08:26.764-05:00The premise is engaging and the opening situation ...The premise is engaging and the opening situation totally believable. My sister became a nurse in the early 70s, when they weren't being treated with the respect they deserve. The character was probably used to being told "go away", and usually by a doctor. I'm totally hooked!<br /><br />Best of luck!Gifford MacShanehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15578566471446994845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-15570424290443954692014-11-28T18:56:53.355-05:002014-11-28T18:56:53.355-05:00As the daughter of a nurse who would come to the d...As the daughter of a nurse who would come to the dinner table with the most interesting (my favorite) and disgusting (my sister's favorite) stories from work, i can only imagine what this book will hold. I really like the style of writing - very relatable, as if the author is telling the story at a dinner party. I think the readers will really connect with her. I'd love to read the whole thing! Cassie Georgenoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-87693701822034159632014-11-28T17:11:10.038-05:002014-11-28T17:11:10.038-05:00What a compelling opening scene. I love the tight ...What a compelling opening scene. I love the tight writing, the naturalistic dialog, and active movement of this excerpt. I'd love to read more of this writer's memoir.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-59668460962146616272014-11-28T17:00:16.107-05:002014-11-28T17:00:16.107-05:00I am intrigued by the premise here, and actually d...I am intrigued by the premise here, and actually do like the title! For me it evokes patients throughout the years calling for assistance. What didn't work for me here was the nurse turning away from the victim, and the class continuing to warm up on the other side of the pool. People don't mind their business, we're not built that way. If a boy was unconcious, surely a crowd would gather, and a nurse would monitor, at least from a few yards away. The writing and premise would keep me interested, but I need complete believability in a memoir. No one else has brought it up, so it may just be me, but I thought it was worth mentioning. Good luck! You've really got something here. liquid34noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-27371974558932855992014-11-28T13:35:38.810-05:002014-11-28T13:35:38.810-05:00Definite tension is created by a medical professio...Definite tension is created by a medical professional being caught outside of her normal surroundings, faced with a life or death situation. What could be more critical than trying to save a human life ?<br /><br />Stepping back, I'd love to hear of your nursing experiences around the world, as well as how the feminist movement affects your male dominated work place.<br /><br />Sign me up !Philip Wickingsnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-70628392705737384952014-11-28T12:35:30.731-05:002014-11-28T12:35:30.731-05:00I think the title is great. For me it conjures up ...I think the title is great. For me it conjures up visions of doctors calling for nurses in an emergency, patients asking for help, etc. Seems perfect based on the first page. <br />Immediately drawn in by the storytelling on page 1! Building tension and stakes in so few words is incredible. Can't wait to read more.Alexis Larkinhttp://www.alexislarkin.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-90658726655449890372014-11-28T10:22:22.659-05:002014-11-28T10:22:22.659-05:00I love this opening--I'm definitely hooked! I ...I love this opening--I'm definitely hooked! I would for sure read more. About the title...it caught my eye, because I'm a nurse. So in that sense it worked, but something more intriguing would probably appeal to a wider variety of readers.<br /><br />I hope I hear about this story when it finds a home, because I'd love to read the whole thing! :)Shari Greenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12495151345889657066noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-6908902929482870502014-11-28T09:43:04.699-05:002014-11-28T09:43:04.699-05:00I like this beginning but I'm not a fan of the...I like this beginning but I'm not a fan of the title (personal taste, probably). I enjoy the detail, and I would keep reading.Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08812966813480183585noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3615675676021392217.post-60173137078681646232014-11-28T07:31:59.907-05:002014-11-28T07:31:59.907-05:00Wow, this beginning is great (and considering I...Wow, this beginning is great (and considering I'm from the land down under, I especially like the logline, ha).<br /><br />As a story that spans decades, I wonder if the title suits it? Obviously I'm not the best person to judge considering I've only seen the first page, but it feels like it should have something more wistful (think GONE WITH THE WIND).<br /><br />Totally personal choice, though. If it doesn't suit you, feel free to ignore me :D<br /><br />Best of luck!Tamara Fnoreply@blogger.com