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Thursday, March 25, 2010

130 MG Historical

TITLE: TRAIN WATCH
GENRE: Middle Grade Historical



August 5, 1941

Dear Mama,

PLEASE COME GET ME AND OTIS! I’m tired of working in the field picking cotton and corn and tobacco
at

11 comments:

  1. MichelleMarch 25, 2010 at 4:41 PM

    I'd keep reading. This made me smile.

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousMarch 25, 2010 at 5:04 PM

    Not hooked. Who WOULDN'T be tired of working in a field picking cotton and corn and tobacco? Maybe if it started out with more description of the "tired"...

    ReplyDelete
  3. Cate KariaxiMarch 25, 2010 at 6:14 PM

    Yes, definitely hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Sharon K. MayhewMarch 25, 2010 at 6:49 PM

    Hooked...

    ReplyDelete
  5. SojournerMarch 25, 2010 at 6:51 PM

    Congrats! Hooked!

    ReplyDelete
  6. melody colleenMarch 25, 2010 at 9:04 PM

    Oh, yes, I'm hooked. I really like this one and wish there had been more to read.

    ReplyDelete
  7. MsJudyMarch 25, 2010 at 10:03 PM

    Hooked. Good job of showing immediately what the story is.

    ReplyDelete
  8. bfavMarch 26, 2010 at 12:59 AM

    I think you set up context really well but I'm not hooked. I know it's a letter but it's "telling." Which is a point of a letter, but if I were a kid, would I care?

    ReplyDelete
  9. Jodi MeadowsMarch 26, 2010 at 6:22 AM

    Not really hooked. Sad, but not hooked. I'm sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  10. MercMarch 26, 2010 at 4:17 PM

    Not hooked, sorry. It feels a bit too forced as a set-up and information.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Cheryl SMarch 27, 2010 at 9:37 PM

    The letter format serves as a bit of an 'As you know, Bob.'info dump.

    The voice comes across as whiny too, which doesn't help me care for your MC.

    ReplyDelete