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Thursday, March 25, 2010

38 Spec Fic

TITLE: Windshifter
GENRE: Speculative Fiction


It was dark-- the dead of night-- and would have been darker if not
for the gas lamps that brightened irregular patches of earth and
at

15 comments:

  1. Adam HeineMarch 25, 2010 at 9:45 AM

    Not hooked. Nothing here for me to latch onto (likely what I want is after the 'and' ;-).

    ReplyDelete
  2. Jodi MeadowsMarch 25, 2010 at 10:08 AM

    Not hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  3. ClaireMarch 25, 2010 at 10:25 AM

    Not hooked--too much like 'it was a dark and stormy night' for my tastes.

    ReplyDelete
  4. fairchildMarch 25, 2010 at 10:43 AM

    Not hooked. Nothing to connect to.

    ReplyDelete
  5. MomwomanMarch 25, 2010 at 11:01 AM

    Dead of night - seen it before. Not hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  6. TamiMarch 25, 2010 at 11:02 AM

    Not hooked. Pretty descriptions, with a slight curiosity pique at the gas lamps, but no character to tie me to.

    ReplyDelete
  7. SelestialMarch 25, 2010 at 11:30 AM

    The lamps are the only thing that grabbed me at all, and that really wasn't enough. Not hooked, though I'd likely finish the sentence.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Sandra Ulbrich AlmazanMarch 25, 2010 at 12:20 PM

    Not hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Joshua McCuneMarch 25, 2010 at 1:11 PM

    Not hooked -- trying too hard to set atmosphere, IMO.

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  10. BarbaraMarch 25, 2010 at 2:32 PM

    It's dark. That's not enough to get me interested in an entire novel. Put your MC into that dark and then I have someone to be interested in.

    ReplyDelete
  11. samsevernMarch 25, 2010 at 4:03 PM

    Not hooked. Sorry.
    I love the title though! ㋡

    ReplyDelete
  12. AnonymousMarch 25, 2010 at 4:27 PM

    Not hooked--sorry! Atmosphere seems a little forced. (25 words is hard!)

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  13. Pat TMarch 25, 2010 at 7:44 PM

    Sorry - didn't hook me.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Katharina GerlachMarch 26, 2010 at 4:03 AM

    I'd read a little more. I like the description but haven't got a character to care for. I'd decide as soon as someone shows up

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  15. MercMarch 26, 2010 at 9:59 PM

    Not hooked. "dead of night" is cliche, and there's too much wordiness. It feels too contradictory without better structure and tightening.

    Shortened and smoothed out (and with knowledge where the sentence is going) and maybe. I like the title.

    ReplyDelete