TITLE: Dark Sight
GENRE: YA Paranormal
16-year-old Seraphine knows what death's like. In fact, she experiences it every time she touches anyone. If only she had listened to her brother about ignoring the visions, then maybe a Berserker (think Mr Hyde) wouldn't have crashed the party resulting in more than one casualty and they wouldn't be on the run - again.
Trying to stay hidden from every oogie boogie isn't easy, especially when Seraphine starts seeing the deaths of students at her new school. This time she’s not going to interfere with her visions, she swears. But that's impossible. Apart from the incredible guilt she's feeling knowing they're going to die, they don't die. Now she has to find out what is bringing the students back without letting her brother find out or he'll probably lock her away for life.
Together with cute and protective J.C. and rebellious Toby, who may or may not be dead, she has to discover why the dead are walking. Along the way she will uncover the truth about her curse and find out why the three Fates are stalking her.
If Seraphine doesn't find out what is happening at school and dodge the Fates her vision of her own death might just become a reality.
Miss Snark's First Victim
NO. There are a lot of books about girls who have some relationship with death right now, and this book doesn't sound compelling enough to go very fan into the genre.
ReplyDeleteNo. This feels too familiar, and the first paragraph confused me.
ReplyDeleteNo. Overall, I'm confused. I think there's too much crammed into this. Right now, I'm picking out three separate storylines and don't see exactly how they connect.
ReplyDeleteNo. I am very confused after even two readings of the query.
ReplyDeleteNO. Like the others, I found it confusing.
ReplyDeleteNo. Though I liked the hook at the end, I was so confused by the time I got there that it just didn't resonate with me the way it should.
ReplyDeleteNo. I wanted to like this but the query is too confusing.
ReplyDeleteNo. Not enough focus within the query.
ReplyDeleteNo. I tried to like it, but it's too confusing.
ReplyDeleteNO, too much back and forth about her abilities. Ignore the visions, don't ignore, can't ignore, etc.
ReplyDeleteAgree w/ everyone else on the query. Unfortunately, this premise is overdone right now.
ReplyDeleteNo. The basics of the story are fine but the world building adds too much confusion.
ReplyDeleteNo. Doesn't feel fresh, details are vague and confusing.
ReplyDeleteNO
ReplyDeletei was confused regarding the worldbuilding, especially about the bit with the berserker
No, too scattered ad too many characters here to know what's going on.
ReplyDeleteNo.
ReplyDeleteThe numerous details were confusing and not really well related--for example, I can't tell if the Berserker is a part of the main plot or just part of backstory, and then, suddenly Fates are stalking her (i.e., I'm not sure who her opposition is).
No-It doesn't really grab me and the description feels weak and confusing.
ReplyDeleteNo. This is a bit scattered and needs tightening without cliched descriptions of teens like cute, protective, rebellious.
ReplyDeleteNo. You're middle paragraph was confusing, and some of the plot points in the last paragraph felt thrown in. I did like it where you mentioned that Toby may or may not be dead, though. Very cute!
ReplyDeleteNo. Like most, this is confusing and, for some reason, I feel like I've heard of it before but can't place where or how.
ReplyDeleteNo.
ReplyDeleteThe query, over all, is incredibly confusing -- plot/world-building soup! Needs to be simplified, with more refined writing.
No.
ReplyDeleteI was totally confused in the first paragraph. I took it as the visions would have somehow gone away if she "ignored" them. I didn't realize she was actually acting to prevent deaths until well into it...which is sorta an important point.
And by "crash the party" I thought you meant something scary showed up at a party. The world hadn't been set up before that so with YA, I assumed a party was a party. (Wait, on second read, maybe that's what you mean?) Honestly, by (think Mr. Hyde) I was just annoyed.
Other things were confusing too, like the brother's role (he's helping her hide, but then he's going to lock her up?)
No - Sorry to say, I was confused on her ability and whether she saw how people would die or experienced death herself. I think a focus on the Three fates stalking her is a better aspect to focus on if it's the main conflict of the story.
ReplyDeleteNo. No sense of what the story is about and what's going on.
ReplyDeleteNo. There is too much going on, and the Fates suddenly appear towards the end of the query, the last sentence needs punctuation or made into smaller sentences.
ReplyDeleteNo. Every sentence seems to pull me in a different direction, introduce a new concept. Overload.
ReplyDeleteNO. I can't figure out what's going on, and her power sounds like it works or doesn't as serves the plot.
ReplyDeleteNo. It's confusing, and some of the writing comes off as clunky.
ReplyDeleteNo - I'm confused - the descriptions of the premise are vague, and talk about it as if I already know what the story is about rather than being explicit.
ReplyDeleteNo. I am completely confused.
ReplyDeleteNo, because Beserker and Mr Hyde are so different that I can't understand why I'm supposed to think of one in relation to the other, and now I am stuck at that point, wondering.
ReplyDelete