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Thursday, March 25, 2010

125 UF

TITLE: Mythos
GENRE: Urban Fantasy



I fingered the stone hanging from the black rope around my neck. "Hey there. So my name is Zydeco, and I’m a recovering mythological creature."

24 comments:

  1. Hm. Partial hook. I'd keep reading to see if the voice worked for me, but the concept of anyone "recovering" from being a mythological creature is intriguing.

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  2. Tami keeps getting to these before me!

    I agree on the voice: It's working now, but will it continue? But the concept is definitely intriguing. I'll keep reading, at least fora bit.

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  3. Hooked.

    I like the concept of a "recovering" mythological creature. I would like to see how it is realised.

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  4. Hooked. ^_^ I like the concept and I'd read on to see what the book's about.

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  5. Hooked. Cracked me up.

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  6. Hooked by the concept, but not the words. Not really sure why.

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  7. I'd keep reading for the "recovering mythological creature" idea, but would likely stop if He/She/It was addressing the reader and not another character.

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  8. Sorry... I'm not hooked yet. I think the hook would be stronger if you started with the statement ala an AA meeting. :)

    Like:

    "My name is Zydec. I'm a recovering mythological creature." I fingered the stone hanging from the black rope around my neck, wondering if I needed to say more than that.

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  9. I like the voice and concept. I'd read on.

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  10. Yup--"recovering mythological creature" got me. I kept thinking of drunk unicorns, though! (grin)

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  11. Hooked, but I do like Catherine's suggested change above.

    I got the picture of Zydec in something like an AA meeting already, but a change like that would make it clearer.

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  12. Awesome! Love the idea of a "recovering mythological creature".

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  13. Intrigued. Zydeco is a great name.

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  14. I would keep going for a while at least.

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  15. I think, "My name is Zydeco and I'm a recovering (insert mythological creature)" would hook me more.

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  16. I agree with some of the others - lead with the AA meeting sentence. Awesome! I'd read on.

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  17. Hooked by the second sentence, not the first.

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  18. LOL. Hooked by the last sentence. If you showed it was a support/therapy meeting and then have the second line of DL (maybe combine it to "Hi, I'm..." since isn't that how it's always done? ;)) and it would be an awesome hook.

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  19. I agree the first sentence doesn't hook... but the second does. Maybe switch it around.

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  20. I'll read on to see if the way you recover from being mythological is interesting.

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  21. Cute hook about the recovering mythological creature. That alone would have me read on

    Not sure about the first line though.

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  22. Like it.

    Suggest dropping the "hey there. So"

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  23. Love it! I think it's fine having the hook in your second sentence as well.

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