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Thursday, May 2, 2019

First 100 #19

TITLE: Isabel Slate Makes the News
GENRE: MG Contemporary Fiction

I slide the last copy of my newspaper into the Smite’s birdhouse mailbox and click the little door shut. When I look up, C.K. Spicer, the cool new kid at Francis Mott School, is riding his bike up the sidewalk. Even sitting on his bike, he’s tall and skinny like a stretched out rubber band.

C.K. slams on his brakes, missing my left foot by half an inch. I want to walk away, but I can’t give him the satisfaction of knowing he annoys me.

"Hey, Isabel, I’ve never heard of an animal listening to a baseball game.”

6 comments:

  1. “I slide the last copy of my newspaper.” I am assuming this person (Isabel) is delivering newspapers like she has a route, but I think the phrasing “copy of my newspaper” is ambiguous like maybe she’s Xeroxed a bunch of homemade newspapers or such. I like “click the little door shut” because I can hear it, so this detail brings me out of the abstract and into the story. Sensory info is so important early on. I then see that Spicer is cool and stretchy, that’s good. The final statement, the one from Spencer to the narrator, Isabel, is *huh?* So, that’s good. I want to see what he is talking about, so I would read on. Nice job.

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  2. The "my" newspaper makes it sound like she/he is the publisher or the owner of the paper which confuses me right from the start since it's probably a paper route (but I'm just guessing that). Aside from that, I think this is cute although "the cool new kid at Francis Mott School" is telling.

    Holly

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  3. I really like this. I love the imagery of a stretched out rubber band. I love how much we get about what she thinks of CK from such a short bit. Him skidding to a stop is classic boy ;) Well done!

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  4. As the others have noted, I'm not sure about the phrasing 'copy of my newspaper' unless it's her own newsletter. Then that would make sense. I love the term 'stretched out rubber band.'. I wouldn't mention the cool kid line. Let their conversation and actions reveal their places in the school social scene. Best of luck.

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  5. You might say "copy of my homemade newspaper" or something similar.

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