Thank you, thank you, one and all, for your entries, your comments, and your continued enthusiasm for our little "crit sessions."
I know the antag thing was challenging. Naturally we want to reveal our "bad guys" in layers, over many chapters. Sometimes the bad guy is someone we trusted all along, in which case the revelation is a big shocker.
So, yeah. It was a stretch. But, truth be told, you rose to the challenge. And we got to meet a few "nasties."
And now I want to ask you a (hopefully) thought provoking question:
How do you fight bitterness?
Let me explain. We're all on this road together. We write, we polish, we submit, we wait, we submit some more. There's a strong sense of support and community among writers online -- especially in places like Verla Kay. And it's encouraging when somebody posts good news.
"Hooray, my PB has sold!"
"Wow, I finally got an agent!"
"I've just earned past my royalties and signed for a third book in my series!"
And on.
So, does something inside you ever make the tiniest little snapping sound? As in, when is it my turn?
When is it my turn?
Not to sound like a snarky, preadolescent brat or anything. Simply, "when is it my turn"?
My turn.
Your turn.
How badly do you want a turn?
Do you live to write? Or write to live?
Are you the quintessential "artiste?" Or someone who works hard to get published, plain and simple?
How do you wash away the bitterness that wants to creep in?
Or, does it never creep in at all?
I've seen where many of you are in your writing. Where are you emotionally on this journey?
Let's have a Literary Therapy session on this almost-summer Friday!
Miss Snark's First Victim
This is a tough one. I've been writing for a number of years and I suffered through the bitter syndrome early on. I think it's a stage most new writers go through. And when I say new, that's a totally relative term. New as in having completed only one or two books. Expectations of a new writer are usually big, so when expectations aren't met, the feeling of bitterness can be intense.
ReplyDeleteMy personal journey has been quite the rollercoaster of success and failure. I've left the bitter phase far behind me, which doesn't mean I've achieved all my goals. I've just adjusted my expectations to something more realistic.
I'm now on my 3rd agent, and this is a good one. A reputable one from the oldest literary agency in New York. I finally have one of the essential tools to reach my publishing goals (I'm only small press published now).
It's hard for writers to watch other writers shoot up the ladder of success five rungs at a time, but that's their destiny. It's what happened for them and I say rejoice with them in their success. Lots of variables are involved, like luck, timing, and talent. Persistence really does pay off!
I'm all over the map on this one. Sometimes I'm just happy to write, I enjoy creating and when I'm on a roll and everything falls into place I'm happy. I love the high of getting the DL just right.
ReplyDeleteOther times, especially ask when I'll get a job or accuse me of being lazy I really want to be published. I want to have something to justify all the time I put into what I do. I want something I can show my family so that they know I'm not crazy. But that's less bitter and more ambitious.
I haven't queried yet. I want to but I know my manuscripts (I have a few mid-way between finished draft and final draft) aren't ready to be seen by an agent. I know that I need some patience and to put in the hours before I'm there.
I do get annoyed when I see some of the books on the market. I hate reading a book and looking in horror at the contents as I say, "My rough draft is better than this!" I can't fathom how some people get published and I can only hope they fade in the dust quickly because they annoy me so...
(ahem)
Anyway... I think, right now, I'm just slogging forward. I'm working, I'm editing, I'm researching agents and reading the market blogs. I'm tracking what's being published and by who and who's selling and who's buying. I'm getting ready. And eventually I will find an agent and editor as crazy as I am who will love my sense of humor, my characters, and my stories and then I'll be off. It'll take time, but I'm going to get there.
Hmmm. Got a request for a partial on the first query letter that went out. Unfortuantely, not right for them. I keep plugging away, sending out the queries and while I do that, work on other stories. I've come to the realization, the only one that's going to make this happen for me, is me. I can whine (and I do) I can cry (I have), but when it's all said and done with, I can do something about it. I can write a better story. I can continue to try and I can enjoy the trip with all the hills and dips, or I can do nothing and quit. When I put it to myself that way, the anwser is easy. For me, I've come too far on this journey to quit, though there are times I'd love to. My Sensei in Karate puts it to me this way, "Everyday we make choices. Today, make the choice to continue on and do your best. Tomorrow, do it again."
ReplyDeleteI've also learned I can't gauge my success on others success or measure my writing against theirs. We all have our own styles and we all are at our own levels. My personal best may not be the same as yours or the other writer's, what seems easy for you may take me longer. The only way to beat the odds and make your dreams come true, is to stop focusing on competeing with others and start focusing on turning out the best story you can and doing everything you can, to make it your best every day.
My father is a cowboy. My grandfather and his father before him going back to the days of the old west. I could ride before I could walk. When I was a child and I got thrown from a horse, my father would make me climb back up, no matter how scared I was, no matter how much I wanted to quit. I was never allowed to walk away. a valuable lesson I learned. So to all writer's who are frustrated with rejection, know that you're not alone. Today, make a choice to climb back up in that saddle and show them who's boss. Then tommorrow, chose again. Eventually you'll find yourself at the end of your journey and realizing your dreams.
I firmly believe this or I would have quit a long time ago.
Like Karen has stated, I'm past the bitterness part. As you know, I frequent VK's as well, but I find the good news threads don't bother me anymore. I think now what gets me is doubt, which is funny because I'm usually such an optomist!
ReplyDeleteI've had a few mag sales, I've gotten an agent. I should be satisfied, think that magical day can't possibly be _that_ far off, right?
A year ago, that's what I thought. Now, I realize that having an agent doesn't translate into a quick success (as the VK boards often seem to say). As my kids get older (one's about to go into junior high next year) I start thinking, is it time to give up? Maybe I should look at plan B (whatever that is).
I go through spurts of this, but I always come back to the same realization--I'm not ready to give up. Too, if I did end up going back to school/working, I'd still write anyway, so what does that say?
That I'm a writer, no matter what. :-)
Authoress.............Jeff Cohen over at "Hey, there's a dead guy on the floor" blogroll is tossing around the idea of a "blog tour" for his book where he goes and guest writes for various blogs. Mine has a readership of, like, nil and probably wouldn't appeal but if it's something you'd be interested. You and Merc's Toasted Scimitar (and Ardyth's and sparkies and everyone else over there) are the only "big" blogs I know off hand where the person might listen to me.
ReplyDeleteAnyways.... happy Monday!
Just_me.....hmm, that's interesting! Thanks for the info. Though I'm not sure this counts as such a "big" blog....leastways, not yet. ;)
ReplyDeleteStill, I will check it out.
The responses to this thread have been AMAZING. Wish I had time to type more right now. Maybe tomorrow.
I just want to thank you for these awesome, transparent, thoughtful responses.
Wow!
I stand ever amazed in your presence.
I've been writing for years, although it has been non fiction.
ReplyDeleteI've been published for non fiction in newspapers and the farmer's almanac. I feel good about that, plus everyday someone will stop me, about something I wrote in the paper and tell me how much they enjoy reading my columns.
Fiction is new to me. I have only been at it a year. So I think it's way to early for me to get bitter. I haven't really submitted any fiction except for places like this web site..
Ask me later, when I am finished rewriting my novel and have shipped it off to 142 agents. :)
Thought provoking question.
I've learned to be philosophical, having twice been through the mill of adopting children. I have to admit that watching people in our adoption support group post their 'We have a child' announcements, while we waited what seemed like forever, was very painful. But it happened for us and it happened in the best way possible at the best time. So I try to look on the posts from happy writers announcing their agents or publications in the same way. It's hard not to feel a little green, but I always tell myself that as long as I keep chipping away at that 'paperwork', one day it will be my turn...if that's what's meant to be, it'll happen.
ReplyDeleteAnd if I do happen to get something, however small, published, I make sure I announce it too!
(poke poke)
ReplyDeleteAre you alive?