I too recognized it. And while i love the sentiment, I'm pretty sure I've read something very close to that first line before. In Harry Potter, I believe- after Sirius dies, the ghost says almost that exact thing, or maybe Dumbledore says it. Anwyay, I think i'd skip it and go to the second more original sentence.
Depending on the summary of the book on the cover-flap, I might or might not keep going. You've neither hooked me nor scared me off. I'd probably give you until the end of the paragraph to get me.
I really like this voice. There is something about the three words inside the em-dashes that throws me off. They don't sound like mortal wounds. Maybe this is explained later...
(Although I will always hear "Death is only the beginning" in... blast, who says it escapes me. You know, the first Mummy movie. ;) I may like that movie too much...)
Hooked!
ReplyDeleteHooked (and that was before I saw the title and knew who posted it). How does a YA MC know all these things, I wondered.
ReplyDeleteIt reads a bit like a pastiche to me. I think it's the combination of agony, anguish and asunder.
ReplyDeleteI really love the belief that Death is only another beginning. Beautiful. I love it! I'm hooked!
ReplyDeleteHoooked
ReplyDeleteI recognize this one. And yep, I'm hooked.
ReplyDeleteI like the voice, I'm hooked
ReplyDeleteI too recognized it. And while i love the sentiment, I'm pretty sure I've read something very close to that first line before.
ReplyDeleteIn Harry Potter, I believe- after Sirius dies, the ghost says almost that exact thing, or maybe Dumbledore says it. Anwyay, I think i'd skip it and go to the second more original sentence.
I like the idea of death as a new beginning but "only another" seems awkward to me.
ReplyDeleteWould read a bit more to see what was going on.
Even if I hadn't recognized it, I would be hooked. :)
ReplyDeleteI thought it was a little overwritten, but I was hooked by the implications.
ReplyDeleteThis is very compelling. Nice!
ReplyDeleteHooked.
ReplyDeleteDepending on the summary of the book on the cover-flap, I might or might not keep going. You've neither hooked me nor scared me off. I'd probably give you until the end of the paragraph to get me.
ReplyDeleteHooked. I've read this before, but I was hooked then too so it still counts.
ReplyDeleteHmmm... not sure I'd keep reading..not what I like to read.. It sounds overly dramatic to me..
ReplyDeleteI really like this voice. There is something about the three words inside the em-dashes that throws me off. They don't sound like mortal wounds. Maybe this is explained later...
ReplyDeleteI'd read on.
Semi-hooked....
ReplyDeleteI think I read the first line and fidgetted a little bit, because it's been said before.
But I like the next line... in that it makes me wonder why the character suffered that torture.
Hooked. :-)
ReplyDeleteI really liked the 1st sentence and the idea that death can be a beginning. I'm not sure about the dashes though. I'd read on.
ReplyDeleteNot hooked. Too dramatic.
ReplyDeleteHOOKED!
ReplyDeleteFantastic opening sentence! ㋡
hook for me.
ReplyDeleteI recognize it and am hooked.
ReplyDelete(Although I will always hear "Death is only the beginning" in... blast, who says it escapes me. You know, the first Mummy movie. ;) I may like that movie too much...)
Hooked, though by the second sentence and not so much the first, as I've seen beginnings like the first sentence before.
ReplyDeleteNicely lyrical pain. Love the voice. Not sure it's something I would read, but you've got me checking it out for sure.
ReplyDeleteThis is good, but I saw quite a bit entries with the theme of death being unimportant, cheated etc.
ReplyDeleteI recognized it, but I am hooked. I love the way you work the title into the first few lines :)
ReplyDeleteLove the title! Thought the first line was a bit cliche but altogether I'm hooked...I'd read it because of the title actually.
ReplyDeleteSounds interesting. I'd read it.
ReplyDelete