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Thursday, March 25, 2010

57 Memoir

TITLE: BOUNDARY STREET
GENRE: Memoir


My red satin jacket, a gift from my sisters-in-law in China, caught on the coarse upholstery of my office chair.
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17 comments:

  1. Jodi MeadowsMarch 25, 2010 at 10:28 AM

    Not really hooked. It's clothes and an office chair. I get the feeling it's supposed to be deeper than that, but I'm just not feeling it.

    ReplyDelete
  2. MomwomanMarch 25, 2010 at 10:38 AM

    Nothing one way or the other.

    ReplyDelete
  3. fairchildMarch 25, 2010 at 11:11 AM

    Not hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  4. AnonymousMarch 25, 2010 at 11:18 AM

    Nothing really to hook me in yet.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Rachelle S.March 25, 2010 at 11:20 AM

    I love this. I think that it sets up a nice conflict for the character in just a few words -- her traditional/family life and her Chinese roots vs. her working/office life. I like the juxtaposition of the satin and the coarse upholstery, very strong sense impressions right off the bat. Good job.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Meghan S.March 25, 2010 at 11:23 AM

    not hooked

    ReplyDelete
  7. Rebecca T.March 25, 2010 at 12:11 PM

    Feels a bit clunky. Don't really get a feel for voice, it's all caught up in super-specific details.

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  8. SophiaMarch 25, 2010 at 1:46 PM

    Not hooked. Can't see a jacket getting caught on upholstery, unless said upholstery is cracked, like an open wound.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Amy Sue NathanMarch 25, 2010 at 2:01 PM

    My thoughts align with Jodi's. Jacket caught on chair doesn't hook me. I want to know about the main character, not clothing.

    ReplyDelete
  10. MHMarch 25, 2010 at 2:30 PM

    I lovelovelove Chinese-American memoir, and love the juxtaposition. Hooked.

    ReplyDelete
  11. PortiaMarch 25, 2010 at 3:01 PM

    The contrast between cultures is here, but I think I need the next sentence to strengthen and frame it for me. I'd say not quite hooked unless the second sentence is very strong.

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  12. Susan B-KMarch 25, 2010 at 3:19 PM

    Thank you all.

    The next sentence reads "So much for red being a lucky color."

    ReplyDelete
  13. BarbaraMarch 25, 2010 at 4:56 PM

    Not hooked. I'm wondering if your MC is Chinese or Chinese American, or if she's Caucasian and just has a sister-in-law who lives in China. Knowing could make the difference for me.

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  14. melody colleenMarch 25, 2010 at 5:03 PM

    Not really hooked yet. Sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  15. jchaneyMarch 26, 2010 at 12:04 AM

    Hooked. At least, I'd read more.

    ReplyDelete
  16. MercMarch 26, 2010 at 9:41 PM

    Not hooked, sorry.

    ReplyDelete
  17. SelestialMarch 27, 2010 at 9:51 PM

    I don't read memoirs. I can't say this hooked me and would make me want to read.

    ReplyDelete