TITLE: Doggedly Dead - A Killer Dogz Mystery
GENRE: Adult Cozy Mystery
Dumped by her husband for their dental hygienist, Lexie opens Hot Dogz, a gourmet hot dog shop with her BFF. When their competition dies while eating the lunch special, The Widow Maker, the handsome Sheriff suspects foul play.
Desperate to clear their names and protect their new business, Lexie searches for a killer, but if she isn’t careful, she may end up on the killer’s menu for murder.
Miss Snark's First Victim
This seems like a fun little mystery. My only nitpick is the title: I was prepared for a book about animals, and expected dead dogs. I wouldn't pick up a book with that thought in mind. But the pitch itself hooked me, and I want to read more.
ReplyDeleteInteresting concept, though not hooked.
ReplyDeleteYour pitch is well-crafted, but what's missing is what makes this mystery unique from others. What is different in your story? Bring that out in the pitch. It could be the setting or some quality of your MC... Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI love cozy mysteries. I agree with the commenter above - the title sounds more like a children's series to me, or perhaps a comedy (which this obviously isn't), but the pitch does a good job of conveying the stakes.
ReplyDeleteI'm hooked! I loved the matter-of-fact and morbid sense of humour. The one sentence I'd change is the last one as I think it could be structured a bit more clearly. I think even splitting it into two sentences would help. I also agree with the others on the title.
ReplyDeleteYou have 7 characters in this pitch. Try to focus on only the ones that matter to your protagonist.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!
Holly
Agree this sounds a little like YA rather than A, but intriguing.
ReplyDeleteGood hook, but I'm confused over the pronouns. Seems like Lexi is MC, but pitch says their hygienist, their competition, clear their names, their biz...oy. would love to see it tightened and cleaned. Would read this story!!
ReplyDelete