TITLE: All that's Holy
GENRE: YA romance/fantasy
Holy Maiden Ysabel is injured during an attempted kidnapping by foreign country coveting her healing powers. When she thought she was about to die, she regretted never kissing Kaine, her bodyguard. Kaine is currently looking after her while she recuperates.
Nestling my feet in Kaine’s lap as I lay back on a pile of pillows, I said, “I’m bored.”
He massaged my feet. “Then let me know how I can serve you, my lady.”
I was just going to ask him to bring me a book, but the way he said that sent heat pooling in my belly. “How about you massage my back, then?” I rolled over.
“I’d love to.” He straddled me and kneaded my shoulders. Mmm, he had heavenly hands. I could feel my tension drifting away. Every so often his chest touched me, feather-light. I started to inch forward to let him access my thighs. “No, don’t move, let me,” he whispered, gently repositioning my legs. He stroked softly at first, then applied more pressure, focusing on each individual muscle.
I cracked an eye open. “You know, I promised you a kiss.”
“You did?”
“Inside my head.” Leisurely, I sat up and stretched.
His breath hitched. I planted my hands on either side of his head, trapping him against the wall. I wasn’t sure which of us moved first. Our lips locked. He tasted like sugar, the glutton, and he ate me alive like one of his pastries, probing with an inexperienced roughness and a gratifying eagerness. My hands wound in his hair as he also grabbed the back of my head. He sucked too hard in his eagerness, so I nipped him, then took over the reins, guiding his tongue in a tantalizing dance.
Miss Snark's First Victim
I have the sense that there's a lot of pent-up tension leading up to this scene! Even without more context, I'm seeing a sort of push-and-pull between their shared desire and whatever is holding them back. If this is in fact what you're going for, I'd suggest that you do more to emphasize it. You write that she stretched "leisurely" -- is she toying with him, drawing out the moment, or pretending it's not a big deal? Then you switch to vigorous imagery with words like "planted" and "trapping." It's an interesting contrast. Maybe because he's serving as her bodyguard there is an element of command in her relationship to him? Though he certainly doesn't seem passive in the kiss! Intriguing stuff.
ReplyDeleteGood luck!