TITLE: The Woodsman's Rose
GENRE: Adult Historical Romance
Breakfast was never a formal event in the Donovan home, but since four of the siblings had moved on, it sometimes seemed quite staid. Today, though, as Daniel padded down the stairs from his room, the conversation emanating from the kitchen was more animated than usual. He pushed through the swinging doors and poured his first cup of coffee while his youngest brother expounded on the merits of his pony.
“Dad, she’s too small. She’s a kid’s horse!”
His father made no response. His mother worked at the stove, her bright red hair curling wildly in the heat and humidity.
Miss Snark's First Victim
The voice says this is a book about an uptight, well-educated brother who doesn't belong with his family. If that's what you're trying to get across, well done.
ReplyDeleteI think this sets things up quite nicely in that right from the beginning we know something is different today and that's exactly where you want to start a book.
ReplyDeleteThis is good, but the use of his youngest brother/his father/his mother is all telling. He would think of them by name in his own head.
ReplyDeleteHolly
I do want to be a little closer in Daniel's POV, get a better feel for him. One small thing: you say his brother was expounding on the merits of his pony, when he's complaining. You could be speaking ironically, but it doesn't have that feel to me. But I am nevertheless intrigued and would read more - maybe it's the red hair curling wildly!
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ReplyDelete