Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Fake Logline Round 2 Winners

HERE ARE OUR WINNING ENTRIES!  Holly Bodger will be judging these, and will choose 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners, to be announced on Monday.

There are 21 instead of 20, because the last 2 places were tied:

3. The 3 tenets of the Authoress' faith are: "write books, wear fabulous hats, eat chocolate." When a talented wordsmith captures her heart via a pitch on her blog, she must choose: allow him to be courted by a Secret Agent, or keep his words all to herself.

5. She is the one—the word weavers’ final hope. When the magical art of storytelling threatens to dwindle in a society addicted to social media gossip, a woman in red emerges to revive a dying breed. Clothed in anonymity to evade detection and ever sacrificing for love of the written word, she bravely toils to inspire a return to eloquence.

8. After blog queen Miss Snark eats a poisoned batch of chocolates from a demented superfan, she slips into a coma and awakens with no memory of who she really is. With the help of a drop-dead gorgeous hardboiled PI, she launches Authoress Anon, a site to entrap the killer before her fellow bloggers fall victim to his coma-inducing confections.

9. The pen is mightier than the sword, particularly when it's a pen that can turn into a sword. Tracy Gotfrey will need to use both if she is to save the mysterious Queen Authoress from the Sorcerer of Slushpile's clutches. If she can not, the whole of the realm will fall into the Vortex of Eternal Revision.

10. A plethora of suitors pursue AUTHORESS. They hang on her every word, longing to catch her ear (or eye, actually.) Alas, in the virtual world of the twenty-first century, distinguishing Pulitzers from imposters takes wit, wisdom, and a rigorous Web site. Will Authoress find a perfect match, or will she be thwarted by the very firewall that protects her?

12. When the master list of Secret Agent identities is stolen, Authoress goes undercover as helpful intern Paige Turner to infiltrate the Library, a shadowy coalition of literary spies. But the real thief may be closer than she thinks, and if Authoress isn’t careful, her next stop might be the slush pile.

15. When mild-mannered writer Audrey (Au) Thoress has her WIP demolished publicly by the dreaded Miss Snark, she faces a choice: numb herself into oblivion with chocolate, or find a way to save other aspiring writers from the wrath of exasperated agents.

16. In a literary world gone mad, one Authoress will join forces with a**-kicking agents and strikethrough-exercising editors to reel in the rampant use of, incorrectly-placed commas, alliteration-excessive adjectives, patently perverse punctuation and--most insidious of all--THE PROFLIGATE USE OF ALL CAPS.

18. When the great Authoress discovers that "Josh Getzler" is ALSO a pseudonym, she must sift through a world of lies, deceit, and handcrafted mitts to figure out who's been stealing her manuscripts and selling them on the black market.

22. When Authoress agress to critique a mystery, she's horrified to learn she is the victim. If she doesn't solve the clues left in the manuscript in time, then fiction and life will meet in a deadly ending.

23. "Running a blog is easy," they said, but they were wrong. When Dr. Whom has a public meltdown and loses his agent, he hires the only lady fit to relaunch his career . Now it's up to Authoress and MSFV to rebuild the disgraced author's image, and novel, one line edit at a time.

25. Rose Athus has led her Browncoats through five years of successful cryptozoological captures, keeping the Agency's laboratories busy and the mundane world safe. But when government cuts threaten to shut the Agency down, Rose and her team find themselves using their unique talents to protect the monsters, who may be the only reason humanity has survived this long...

26. After killing the Sugar King and taking his life supply of decadent dark chocolate truffles, the beautiful Authoress is on the run. The Sugar Prince has vowed to capture her and bring her to justice, but he isn't prepared to fall in love with her. Authoress learns that fighting for her chocolate is nothing compared to fighting for her heart.

28. After a fight over the Oxford comma puts a period to her marriage, aspiring novelist Authoress vows to save her love for fictional characters only. But when a chance gust sweeps her trademark red hat (and her heart) into the hands of Josh Getzler, she’ll risk it all to decide if he's Mr. Write...or just another agent of heartbreak.

30. A nanotechnology terrorist going by the name of TH3B!TT has crashed the planetary AngelNet causing widespread panic and death. An elite team of nano-hack experts, led by THEAUTHORE$$, is formed to retake the AngelNet and restore the nano-enabled medical safety systems everyone depends on. The team must unravel the secret of "The_Sacred_Doodlefart" a children's fantasy made terrifying after AngelNet crashed.

31. Authoress has known her toaster was haunted for years, but when a botched exorcism relocates the spirit into her vaccuum it's worse - now she can hear it's voice over the appliance's sucking roar. And it's telling her I was murdered.

35. When femme-fatale spy, Authoress, reveals her identity to a community known as ‘Blog’ she knows her life will change forever. Once the victim of a Snark, she uses her devilish pen to make her dreams come true. Will Secret Agent Josh sell her soul to ‘The Publisher', or will she run into the arms of the mysterious Mr A?

40. When evil space cows kidnap the famous writer Authoress and force her to be their earth spokesperson for their hypnotic drug-laced milk, Authoress must rely on her skill in karate and ventriloquism to overthrow the cows and save the world.

44. Against the wishes of her Victorian family, Authoress constructs a coterie of clockwork minions to assist in her grand plan of opening a love-match steamnetwork. But a business rival kidnaps her silent partner (and secret love) Mr. A in a bid to shut down her now-thriving business. Can Authoress and her clockwork minions rescue Mr. A before it’s too late?

45. When Authoress goes mad from dissecting one error-strewn chapter too many, she takes her razor-edged wit and and bloody scalpel directly to befuddled writers. The legendary Miss Snark, armed with a cluegun, throwing stiletto, and spiked thesaurus on a chain, must return from her lovenest at Lake Cuomo to stop MSFV from claiming more victims for herself.

48. In Paris, a gorgeous woman in a red hat finds herself surrounded by the disciples of Unedited Fiction. With only a red pen and clever wit at her disposal, she must figure out what the disciples are trying to say before they send their work to unsuspecting literary agents.


The Prizes--critiques have been graciously donated by authors from our MSFV Success Story passe.  They will be distributed as follows:

1st place winners: You will each receive 3 separate critiques of your first chapter, plus 1 query critique.

*Chapter (Helene Dunbar), Chapter (Alice Loweecey), Chapter (Leah Petersen) + query (Peter Salomon)

*Chapter (Sarah Brand), Chapter (Karen Akins), Chapter (JM Frey) + query (Alice Loweecey)

*Chapter (Beth Hull), Chapter (Jenn Malone), Chapter (Josh McCune) + query (Kristi Helvig)

2nd place winners: You will each receive 1 first chapter critique and 1 query critique.

*Chapter (Danielle Jensen) + query (Michael Gilmartin)

*Chapter (Dorothy Dreyer) + query (Monica BW)

*Chapter (Kristi Helvig) + query (Stacey Lee)

3rd place winners: You will each receive a query critique.

Query (Tara Dairman)

Query (Monica Goulet)

Query (Stephanie Scott)

Also:  Remember the SPECIAL-FUN PRIZE I mentioned?  Look for the next post to appear soon!


  1. Congrats to everyone! Can't wait to see who wins.

  2. Congrats to everyone! It was so much fun reading all the entries.

  3. Wow, those prizes just got seriously amazing. :D

  4. Congratulations! I love that so many of the ones I voted for are in round two.
    I have to admit, I didn't even like my own entry after I read some of the others. Kinda glad I didn't get chosen.

  5. So glad to see so many fabulous entries here! And thanks to Authoress for hosting this fun contest!

  6. What amazing prizes! And amazing entries! Thanks to Authoress for her amazing generosity and good luck to all!

    Although I personally wish #1 made it in. Love those evil mimes!

  7. PS~ Thanks, Holly! You're amazing, too!

  8. Those are hilarious! I think my favourite is number 28, just because of the puns! They burn!