Thursday, April 22, 2010

50 Words #47

TITLE: The Mistake
GENRE: Thriller

Against the advice of my mentor, I keep a gun in my drawer. Harvey says a lawyer with a gun in his desk will eventually use it either on a client or on himself. Harvey's almost sixty and thinks he knows everything.

I open the drawer and reach for it.

24 comments:

  1. Oh my I am hooked. Great opening.

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  2. Good opening. Would definitely read on. Is Harvey right or not? Gotta see.

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  3. Yep, I'm hooked, too. Nice job.

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  4. Hooked. I'm especially interested because the title makes me think he's going to do something terrible.

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  5. Love it! Great start, I'm hooked. Very well done.

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  6. Good voice. I'd read on.

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  7. I'd definitely read on. ^_^

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  8. Hooked, although there's a disjointedness about this that I find troubling.

    However, the impression that disjointedness gives me is that the main character is mentally a bit unhinged. If that's what you're trying to get across, it works well.

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  9. I really like this and want to know which option the main character takes - uses the gun on himself or a client

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  10. Hooked. Would definitely read more.

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  11. I like this. The second sentence is cleverly worded, and I really want to know why he's reaching for this gun. Good job.

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  12. OMG--I just realized this was in present tense. It takes some good writing for me to miss that!

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  13. This is the first one that has hooked me (I am reading them in backwards order though).

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