TITLE: Frame of Reference
GENRE: Adult Suspense/Intrigue
All Quinn wants is a little excitement. Enter handsome library patron James, who asks for her help researching an art collection. Soon, her apartment is tossed and her life is threatened by an international arms dealer. Her library skills come in handy when she and James must uncover which artifact hides information about a lost cache of weapons before the arms dealer can and threaten more lives.
Being a librarian is a lot like being a secret agent, her grandfather told her once. Like a good spy, a librarian has to be quick thinking, resourceful and tenacious. He’d assured her he knew about such things since he’d read just about every spy novel ever published.
Quinn appreciated his elevated opinion of those in her chosen profession. To her, though, the comparison was more than a little over the top. She liked to believe she was quick thinking, resourceful and tenacious, given she was known to follow bits of bibliographic data like a bloodhound after an escaped convict until she tracked down a requested book or answered a reference question. Still, it wasn’t as exciting as disabling a space-based death ray pointed at the White House by a maniacal villain bent on world domination.
She snipped off another strip of red book repair tape from a roll and used it to attach the swag of fake green garland and colored twinkle lights to the front of her metal desk. She smiled when she thought of how her grandfather would approve of her unconventional use of library supplies.
The trimming secured, she crawled under the desk manufactured during the Eisenhower administration and plugged the lights into the power strip. She grunted when her head banged against one side of the desk as she backed out from the tiny space and a hollow bong reverberated around her. Good thing for her skull it sounded worse than it felt.
I love the juxtaposition of the "space-based death ray" image with the prosaic one of snipping red book repair tape, a perfect encapsulation of the "excitement" present in a librarian's day. It made me smile, as did her mild gloating over her "unconventional use of office supplies." Fun. Also, it's clever to describe the desk as being from "the Eisenhower administration," because ain't it the truth that libraries are never well-funded--not like secret agent missions, anyway. This is a charming beginning, and you've packed a lot of information into it--the tight relationship with her grandfather, that it's Christmas season (I presume), the description of a librarian's research role, and the fact that her grandfather learned about spies by--guess what?--reading books. Funny. If I were an agent, I'd request this manuscript to read. Good luck to you!
ReplyDeleteI love the idea of a librarian taking on an international arms dealer with the power of her research skills--totally my kind of book. :) You might consider changing the first line so that we get Quinn's name earlier--"…Quinn's grandfather told her once" instead of "…her grandfather told her once." I also wonder if the opening is maybe a bit quiet for a suspense book. But it's hard to judge from the excerpt you posted--250 words isn't a lot.
ReplyDeleteGreat first line! I get the feeling her life is about to become more exciting very quickly. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteThe voice in this is superb and i love how you connect the roll of secret agent to librarian the way you did. It's good foreshadowing for the intrigue plot to follow. We know Quinn will be good at sussing out whatever mystery element is involved in the plot.
ReplyDeleteYou do a good job weaving the setting with the character. I get a good sense of who she is.
Great job and good luck!
This is excellent! Funnily enough, I saw just the first few words "being a librarian" and I kept reading without even looking at the logline. It's funny, and even though you only had 250 words in which to achieve it, I already like the heroine.
ReplyDeleteGood job and good luck!
Someone earlier described this as charming, and I think that's a perfect description. There is so much we learn about Quinn so quickly, from her (obviously close) relationship with her grandfather to the fact that she finds her life rather mundane.
ReplyDeleteThe detail is fantastic as well. I could clearly picture the scene you were describing. I wish I had some helpful critique, but I think it's very intriguing the way it is.
Best of luck!
There's a lot to like here. I agree with one earlier comment -- get Quinn's name in quickly so that you can establish this is her story.
ReplyDeleteAlso, the first paragraph starts with a non-action verb and some passive voice. Perhaps your third paragraph can be reworked slightly so that it is your opening. And the librarian-secret agent comparison, now that it is set up, can come in the third paragraph.
Finally, there seems to be a lot of detail in this passage, some of which you might be able to scatter through the rest of the scene or chapter. I like her creative use of library supplies. Hopefully James is on the way quickly -- perhaps he is standing there when she raises up from banging her head?
I want to read the rest of this chapter, which is the point. Good luck in the auction
Great pitch! Sounds like a fantastic and thrilling book. If anything I think you could go even bigger with the spy analogy at the beginning here and have fun foreshadowing what's to come.
ReplyDeleteThe language of the first sentence was a bit stilted for my taste. Perhaps addressing the passive voice comment from a previous poster would clear that up.
Good luck in the auction!
25 pages
ReplyDelete30 pages. Man, we like all the same ones, don't we?
ReplyDeletehehehe
ReplyDeleteI raise you 50
Well then, I'm going to go ahead and say 60. No worries, I can do this all day...well, a good portion of the day anyway.
ReplyDeleteok ok 75
ReplyDeleteI've got all night...
Well then, how about I raise you to 100?
ReplyDelete150 and...
ReplyDeletefull!
ReplyDeleteNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
ReplyDeletehehehe
ReplyDeleteCLOSED! Full goes to Rena Rossner.
ReplyDeleteWhen reading this, I found myself wishing for a cup of tea while sitting and devouring the entire manuscript. The character pulls you into her world, and I know she is destined to get into trouble! I want to get into that trouble with her.
ReplyDeleteBest of luck!