TITLE: A Sexuality
GENRE: YA romance
Patrick Johns worked twelve stinking hours in broken air-conditioning while wearing a tampon shirt.
A tampon shirt.
When his boss Gary barked at him to go home, he told Patrick, quote/unquote: “Don’t worry, Paddy. Ya get to wear the shirt next time as well!”
Patrick looked at Gary like Gary should explode. Or the shirt. Either way.
‘The shirt’—a hot pink polo—featured an enlarged picture of an unwrapped tampon on the back.
To advertise feminine hygiene products to customers seeking fuel.
Patrick was certain they’d never actually stocked tampons at the garage shop.
But Gary’s life and business partner, Yvonne, had acquired a marketing diploma from a suspect institution—with the help of a discount off a shopper-docket—and assumed she was now equipped to market crap. The tampon shirt was Phase 1.
The bloody shirt was two sizes too small for Patrick. He had to keep yanking it down to cover his hairy stomach. He did not appreciate the volume of giggles from the giggling girls this morning. Today, he even got giggles from the school boys.
And as the sun’d risen higher, the heat of the day had slammed into him through the towering shop windows, turning the synthetic shirt into something like a giant leech. It made a slow thwick sound each time he peeled it off his sweaty skin.
People stared. Some fell onto shop items, in hysterics.