Thursday, June 27, 2013

First Sentence #32

TITLE: Closets
GENRE: YA Contemporary

It's not lying if you're acting; it's art.

48 comments:

  1. Yes. The character's voice is very clear in just a few words.

    ReplyDelete
  2. YES. The main character's voice is so strong, and the premise is intriguing. There are so many ways for events to play out, that it draws me in right away.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yes. This line made me chuckle, and that's a sure-fire way to get me to read on.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Yes, great voice and a great line.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Yes!
    Love it. Defending a lie is a great opener, and liars are almost always interesting and multi faceted folks.
    Actors—same.
    PS Also like the title. It suggests something hidden.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Yes. This suggests an unreliable narrator which makes for a fun read.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yes! Love it. Just simple and intriguing.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Yes. Made me chuckle as well, which would make me keep reading.

    ReplyDelete
  9. As someone who dabbles in acting, this gets a huge yes. Would love to read it.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Yes. Although, I hope the readers will like the protagonist if she's a liar. A fine line :) But I would read on!

    ReplyDelete
  11. yes. Cute and clever--And i've heard this from my little guy.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Yes. Love it. Lots of voice and character from the start.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Yes, made me smile and even if I've heard this before, I definitely wanted to know more!

    ReplyDelete
  14. Yes. While the concept isn't new, the voice is interesting and the line hints at things to come.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Yes! 100%. Not a new concept but a perfect begining for YA.

    ReplyDelete
  16. Yes. Very, very strong voice and a hint of tension/misbehaviour which would pull me on.

    ReplyDelete
  17. YES!!!! It's short, concise, interesting. Yes.

    ReplyDelete
  18. Yes

    Though i wonder if it might pack a bigger punch if you flipped it:

    If you're acting it's not lying--it's art.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Yes- because I connect with the saying and it made me smile.

    ReplyDelete
  20. After all these very affirmative "yes" statements, I feel bad that I'm on the fence.

    I dunno, I guess I didn't love the fact that the story starts with a "saying" in which so many people are familiar.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Yes, I love the voice here and I want to know more.

    ReplyDelete
  22. No. Don't like the use of the cliched saying.

    ReplyDelete
  23. Yes. You've given us a great glimpse into this character's mind in just a few words.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Yes. Love the voice...and I giggled. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  25. Yes. Your character is already justifying something we've been taught is wrong. So I want to know about his/her artistic expression. And why the MC is so defensive at the outset.

    ReplyDelete
  26. Yes. I love the main character instantly. There's going to be oh so much trouble!

    ReplyDelete
  27. YES. It really caught my attention and it sounds like something my 12-year-old would say.

    ReplyDelete
  28. Yes. We leap right into your voice from the get-go.

    ReplyDelete
  29. Yes. I'm having mixed feelings about the semi-colon (em dash or separate sentence could be interesting, perhaps?), but I love the voice, and am intrigued about the character (makes me wonder if she'll be an unreliable narrator, and it makes me think she's quite dramatic/fun to read about). Also love the title.

    ReplyDelete
  30. No. Not a fan of opening with philosophical statements. It's telling not showing.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Yes. It makes me laugh... and it almost feels true. I would like to get to know this character for sure.

    ReplyDelete
  32. Yes. Awesome way to lay out voice and character and setting.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Yes
    Immediate insight into the thoughts of the MC.

    ReplyDelete
  34. Yes! The voice is awesome. This opening defense leaves me smiling and eager to read on.

    ReplyDelete
  35. Yes, but like KO, I'm troubled by the semi-colon. A dash would set off a short addition better. The semi-colon seems to call for a longer phrase, to make the sentence more balanced.

    I almost said no because I also don't care for philosophical statements at the beginning of the book. I gave it a pass because it's so short. But if the rest of the first paragraph is an extended musing on lying, acting, honesty, etc., I'd put the book down.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Yes. This is a person who justifies his/her actions and those are interesting characters to follow.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Yes. In one line I already know something important about the character.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Yes. You've given us the character's voice right out of the gate.

    ReplyDelete
  39. Yes. Made me smile and gave a great sense of voice.

    ReplyDelete
  40. No: I've heard this saying quite a few times before.

    ReplyDelete
  41. No--There's no hint of story here. You've given us an interesting statement, but that's all it is without context. The story could be about anything. I'm not drawn in.

    Perhaps consider starting with something that actually happens in the story.

    ReplyDelete
  42. Thank you for the yes's and the advice - I appreciate all of it. I had to laugh at myself - I totally thought I made this line up and that there was no way it could be cliche lol!! That's what critique groups are for :) Thanks, again!

    ReplyDelete