TITLE: Guzzy Goofball and the Homeschool Play from Outer Space
GENRE: MG Contemporary Humor
I don't know what my parents were thinking. Who in their right minds names an innocent little baby boy, Guzman Reginald Guferntible IV? Or rather, what was great-great grandpa Guferntible thinking?
I know from family stories that Great-Grandpa Guzman didn't mind. In the early 20th century, a lot of people had strange names. My grandpa goes by his middle name, Reg, and avoids the whole Guzman issue. Dad, though he's technically the third, tried to go by Junior. Somewhere along the way that morphed into J.R. and Mom changed it into Jer (rhymes with air). Me? Around three or four, I decided I would try the sophisticated approach and called myself Guzman. (It was better than being called Little Manny by my mom.) But after the third trip to the emergency room, my friends decided Guzzy fit me better. And when Shriek's little sister couldn't pronounce Guferntible and introduced me as Guzzy Goofball, it stuck. Much like the once-pink gum permanently attached to the bottom of my favorite sneaker.
Shriek, my best friend and fellow homeschooler, lives down the block with her six assorted siblings. She's third in the stacking and the same age as me. As the only homeschoolers in our neighborhood and on the same street, no less, we've been friends since we didn't head off to kindergarten. It's easy to tell a homeschool kid once school is in session.