TITLE: Glimmr
GENRE: YA Psychological Thriller
It’s Black Mirror meets Pretty Little Liars when sixteen-year-old Fin Bailey creates Jane, her perfect virtual best friend, and finds out the hard way that things on the internet live forever. Jane takes on a life of her own, posting pictures that Fin didn’t create—pictures that implicate her in a series of horrible accidents—and Fin has to stop her before she reveals an even darker truth.
Hi! Well I'm certainly intrigued! One suggestion would be at the end "she reveals an even darker truth"- maybe switch the "she" to Jane? That would keep the pronouns super clear.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I'm curious if the implications of the horrible accidents are also true? Or are those fake set ups, but Fin also does really have a dark secret?
This a little bit hints at some sort of Gossip Girl, all-seeing internet persona vibe too, and I'm digging it.
Sounds intriguing! I'd love to the first 50 pages of this.
ReplyDeleteI'd love to see a synopsis and the first 50 pages.
ReplyDeleteCompletely hooked! I particularly love the line "finds out the hard way that things on the internet live forever." Very creepy and foreboding! No critiques from me.
ReplyDeleteLove the sound of this! Please send your query + first 3 chapters my way to consider further :)
ReplyDeleteThis sounds really cool. My favorite line- things on the internet live forever. The possibilities here seem endless. Good luck!
ReplyDeleteHello,
ReplyDeleteCan you please send me your query and the first 100 pages to my email below?
Thanks!
Carrie Hannigan
HSG Agency
channigan@hsgagency.com
Ooo, nice!
ReplyDeleteI love this! No advice on improvements, I think it's great.
ReplyDeleteReally, really good! The very end of the last line didn't read as well as the rest, but as someone said just changing the "she" to "Jane" might help there. First sentence hooked me.
ReplyDeleteOh this sounds really cool! I’d love to see the first 50 pages + a synopsis. You can upload everything via QueryManager: QueryMe.online/1005/ABBlogpitch
ReplyDeleteMoe Ferrara
BookEnds Literary
Could you send query and first ten pages to info@thebentagency.com. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteJenny Bent
The Bent Agency
Love it! Definitely grabbed my attention. I think those comp titles would garner a lot of interest.
ReplyDeleteIntriguing. Please email your query + 3 chapters + synopsis to lauren@triadaus.com, and include "Birthday Blog Pitch" in the subj line. I look forward to reading!
ReplyDeleteSounds awesome! Please send the query letter and manuscript to queries@ldlainc.com. And include Birthday Blog Pitch in the subject line. Thanks!
ReplyDeleteGreat premise! Congrats on the requests!
ReplyDeleteI'm a little thrown by "and finds out the hard way that things on the internet live forever." Does this happen before Jane takes on a life of her own (and if so, how has she come to the end of forever before this even starts?) Maybe you need to reword to something more exact.
ReplyDeleteAside from that, I'd like to know more about how Jane knows her secrets. Does she have access to her hard drive or her memories or her Facebook messages or something?
Good luck!
Holly
This is so cool! Please send your query and first 50 pages with the subject line "Requested Materials" to querydanielle@nelsonagency.com. I can't wait to take a look!
ReplyDeleteI absolutely love this concept.
ReplyDeleteIt's like the Bff concept but with traits of single white female.
Would love to see exactly what happens.
Good luck!
Thanks for the feedback, everyone!
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