Miss Snark's First Victim
Like it, though not the title, and I think the back half of the sentence could be cleaned some (e.g., cut 'entry' or even 'entry door').
Not hooked. Bothered by someone hearing humming and the sound of a key scraping in a door from "deep sleep". Unless "uncanny hearing" was part of this person's magical abilities, it threw me from the start. No real sense of the MC's character or voice here.
That is some title. The first sentence is ok, but it's not as unique as I'd like. I'm afraid I'm not hooked.
Don't know that I like the tone of someone entering an apartment where the resident lays in deep sleep. Also feels a bit disconnected. I'm not really hooked on this one.
I liked the description of the key scraping, but NOT the title. Pass.
Nobody hears anything from deep sleep. If you're in REM you might be woken by the sounds described. Still you would be slightly confused before you got your bearings on the situation. Unless, the sleeper has a very unusual alacrity (magically enhanced) this is an immediate turn off for me.
Not hooked. Waking up scenes almost never do it for me.
Not hooked. First, it's unlikely that someone's going to pick up on humming and a scraping key in a deep sleep, as has been pointed out. Also, even if that did penetrate, where's she sleeping that she can hear someone outside the apartment humming? Unless it's a very, very small apartment or she's sleeping on the couch, I'm wondering if the humming would actually carry all the way to the bedroom.
I would read on to find out who's scratching their key at the entry door.
I love your title. But that must be some damn loud humming! I'd re-think this beginning - it seems like I wasn't the only one sceptically contemplating being awoken by mere humming. I'm sure you want me to think about the story and not logistics. Good luck!
Not hooked. I don't want to read another waking-up opening unless you can do something fantastic with it, but so far this doesn't hold the promise it will work.