Miss Snark's First Victim
Not my genre...but I'm hooked
Not my genre either, but I liked this. I'd probably read on a little bit.
I'd read to see where it went.Faith is a popular name for this round.
Kinda hooked. I'd probably read on because of the last line.
I'd read on.
i like it.
I kinda am hooked.Only nitpic (sorry, backseat writer) is the two questions. I'd settle with one (Why wasn't he answering?) and maybe work the other one in elsewhere.
Mildly hooked. I'd read on.
I think your third sentence is your hook. I'd rearrange for maximum effect. The last candle sputtered out, officially killing Faith's romantic evening. She slammed down the phone. Where was he and why wasn't he answering?
I agree with Amy Sue Nathan. The last sentence would be a great first sentence.
Not hooked. She's expecting a romantic evening (I would assume it's with someone she cares about) and he doesn't show, and she's pissed off instead of worried. I immediately don't like her.
I also agree that the last line might make a better first line. I would continue reading.
Sorta hooked. My comments rehash what's already been said: last sentence as the hook, one question only (where was he?), and maybe she doesn't slam the phone down
I like it, but might even cut out the first sentence. It has potential, but you can do better.
I agree with the suggestion others have made about taking the last sentence and inserting it as the first. Also, I feel like her thoughts should be in present tense, not past (or maybe remove the italics so that change doesn't have to be made).Nonetheless, I was definitely hooked. (:
Agree with sentence rearranging, but hooked either way.
Not really hooked, sorry. Could be a genre thing.