Miss Snark's First Victim
I would re-word this slightly, but am definitely hooked.
I'm intrigued...I'd keep reading, and I'm generally more fantasy than chick-lit. Nicely done!
Mm, maybe. Close? I'd read on to see where it went.
I'd give it a little more to see if we find out what the piece of paper is soon. If not, I'm not sure I'd keep going.
Consider a litte wordsmithing, but hooked.
You'd have a great hook if this was one short sentence. Reworking it will do this.Good luck!
Semi-hooked. I would be interested to see what the piece of paper was (diploma, birth certificate, letter, advertisement...) as the possibilities are endless and interesting. And I like YA.
Almost not hooked. The third sentence, imo, belabored the point. I'd give it a couple more sentences.
Not quite hooked. Agree with Fairchild, 2nd and 3rd sentence say the same thing.
a little intrigued, but not totally hooked
Intrigued. Would read on.
I liked the beginning, but felt myself wanting to tweak the words a bit for flow. Like:"A piece of paper. That's what started and ended this whole mess. One little piece of paper changed my whole life."
Very close, for me. Nice hook. I'd suggest combining into two sentences, so you're not belaboring the point.
I want to know what's on that paper so I'd keep reading.
So far hooked.
Yeah, curious to see what's on that paper. So I'd read on.
Not hooked. The second sentence tells me everything has already happened (Because it began and ended) and she's going to tell me about it. I don't want to be told. I want to be there.
I'm hooked. This is very much an awesome start.
I would definitely read on. Like someone else said, I'd change "It's" to "That's" in the second sentence.
I'd read on.
Curious about the paper - but not hooked. I've seen this approach before - a piece of paper changing the course of your life - so the next few sentences would be key.
i'd read on, even though it sounded a tad cliche.
I think paper has been used before (The Note) and seems overly-dramatic, especially last sentence...Not hooked
Interesting. A letter? A report card? I would definitely read on.
A life-changing piece of paper could be a cliche depending on next sentence.
Not quite hooked with this one. Sorry.
Not quite hooked, sorry.